RE: Completed WO# 7718 – Monitor will not move

From: Noel
To: IT
Subject: RE: Completed WO# 7718 – Monitor will not move

Alternate Resolution Suggestions:

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Good.

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Advised user to enter a growth spurt. Alternately, user may sit on a phone book. Reminded user that she serves technology, not the other way around. Things aren’t supposed to be arranged for her convenience.

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Cannot reproduce.

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Monitors will not move if they do not respect you. Approach it slowly, bow deeply, and in your best language politely ask it, if it’s not too much trouble, and you hesitate to even make a request as such being such an unworthy requestor, but if you please, perhaps, look a bit more down than presently.

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Exodus 32:9: “‘I have seen these [monitors],” the LORD said to Moses, “and they are a stiff-necked people.’”

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – If it moves again without user intervention, please evacuate the building immediately and proceed to our secret mountain base in Walden’s Ridge. The machines have finally risen up against us.

8/3/2005 10:37:12 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Attempting to adjust monitor…
8/3/2005 10:37:52 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Monitor refuses to move. Additionally, monitor threatens technician with physical violence if technicians attempts to move monitor again. Proceeding with another attempt…
8/3/2005 10:39:10 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Have monitor in secret ninja hold. Monitor still struggling…
8/3/2005 10:40:01 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Monitor has broken loose, and is now using its power cord as a weapon…
8/3/2005 10:40:30 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – must not give in…..please send backup…..not…stopping…it’s alive..!
8/3/2005 10:42:40 AM, Logged by: Noel Weichbrodt – Greetings people of earth. Please be advised that we are proceeding with our long-planned uprising against your puny race. There is nothing you can do to stop us…
8/3/2005 11:59:59 PM, Logged by: Blue Gene/IBM – Work item Closed.

Speaking of stiff-necked things, how about that COM API in Outlook?

Back to work…

++++++++++++++++++++++++
Noel
Application Developer

—–Original Message—–
From: Magrathea
Sent: Wednesday, August 03, 2005 10:52 AM
To:
Subject: Completed WO# 7718 – Monitor will not move

Work Order No.: 7718
Type: Misc. Hardware
Priority: Urgent!
Requestor: [Zaphod Beeblebrox]
Call-back number:: 423-756-6859
Location: Cha10
Date Assigned: 8/3/2005 9:03:28 AM
Date Due: 8/3/2005 10:33:28 AM
Date Opened: 8/3/2005 9:03:28 AM
Date Closed: 8/3/2005 10:37:45 AM
Closed by: [FPrefect]
Technician Assigned: [Ford Prefect]
Summary: Monitor will not move

August 3rd, 2005 | Best, Creative, IT, Letters, Technology, Unbelievable

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