Quality American Soccer, For Under $1,000,000

The MLS Players Association leaked players salaries again this year. There’s some real bargains in there (and some kids who must be living at home with their parents while the play a professional sport). In fact, I’ll assemble a team that could easily test a mid-table Premiership squad. We’re talking world-class quality here, for under a million greenbacks. Behold, a classic 4-4-2 that will make Everton weep:

GK Reis, Matt $100,000 (hey, splurge on the goalie. you’ll only need one)
D Serioux, Adrian $90,000
D Dunivant, Todd $95,000
D Parkhurst, Michael $63,250
D Wynne, Marvell $47,500
M Mapp, Justin $95,000
M Martino, Kyle $81,675
M Nunez, Ramon $75,000
M Dempsey, Clint $75,863
F Rolfe, Chris $50,000
F Cooper, Kenny $55,000
F Gomez, Hercules $47,000 (just for fun, a twelfth man, Mr. Assist himself)

Grand Total

Ye gods! By Hercules, we’ve assembled a band of fleet-footed mighty men, and still have moolah left for the kit & caboodle that these boys might demand. Red Bull and Twinkies for all! I dare you to find another league in the world with these kinds of deals.

Blue Light Specials
GK Guzan, Brad $47,250
D Ihemelu, Ugo $50,000
M O’Rourke, Danny $34,125
M Davis, Brad $77,500
M-F Storey, Marcus $11,700
F Kamara, Kei $30,000

April 29th, 2006 | Soccer